Cool Hand Luke’s Dinner

This three star assignment was to take an image from the daily shoot and write a haiku about it. After searching through a few images, I chose this one because it seemed the easiest to relate to the western theme. I don’t think I have ever seen a western movie that they didn’t eat beans at least once.

 

Eat beans on the trail
No can opener in sight
Guess I need a rock

Seven days this week
I can’t eat another can
Some beef sounds better

 

 

2011-272 Beans

How many x words even exist?

This 3 star writing assignment was to write a story in alphabet.  The challenge is to write a story using a word starting with each consecutive letter, the more sense it makes, the better.  X is a real problem though, and there are only two ways around it that I can see…  Either forego literal sense, or bend the rule. I chose the latter as you can see in my story about boy who hates his mother’s dinner option.

A boy called dinner. Everyone from grandmas’ heard. I just kinda lingered, mom’s noodles’ odor proliferated. “Quit remonstrating,” said tiny uncle Vern. “We’ve extra yellow zucchini”

Hot Lead Lunch

This two star  assignment was to write a terrible death ending for a choose your own adventure style book. It was a great assignment to incorporate the western theme; no shortage of deaths in gun battles in westerns. It was fun to take a typical western finale scene and create a silly twist that meant that the hero wasn’t going to go down in glory like usual.

You Chose Wrong!

The man that challenged you to a fight only looked like he was a loner. After venturing out in the street for an old fashioned draw, you noticed an ominous glimmer from a rooftop across the road. Turns out the whole thing was an elaborate scheme, and that the man on the roof whose gun barrel just revealed him was still sore at you for taking the sheriff job in the old 4 horse town you had left. Before you could draw your weapon or even turn tail and run, you heard the loud report from the rooftop rifleman and felt the bullet tear though the flesh in your abdomen. It was at that time that the man who called you into the street drew his revolver and fired two more well aimed shots. You were dead before you hit the ground.

 

The future: More than just a search for amazing tacos

Your Hopes, Dream and Fears is an assignment to write a letter to myself in ten years, that I might be able to look back and reflect upon it later when I read it.  I am old enough that I think my goals are static, whether I achieve them or not is another matter, but I will remember them…. I think. It is odd that looking back to ten years ago, the goals I had at the time have all pretty much gone by the wayside as life barreled forward. These goals, though both limited in scope and somewhat broad, are more impassioned than those, so hopefully this time it is a little different.  I really dislike thinking so much about the future, but assignments like this are good because they keep the pressing need to progress along the path I have chosen at the front of my mind instead of passively waiting for the world to unexpectedly take notice of how wonderful I am and hand me all the opportunities I desire.

Dear future me,
I think a lot about where my life has been and where I intend for it to go. I spent my youth comparatively aimless for a variety of reasons, so it is nice now to have some intended direction, and to have the wisdom to realize that no matter what I intend, life may have other plans and that I can be ok with them.  Hopefully this is a characteristic that you still share, but let me tell you about the things I aim to work toward in the mean time.
Professionally, you (me) ought to have finished law school or graduate school by now. Don’t put that off like you did college. If we (myself and I) are able to attend a worth while law school, meaning if you did well enough on the LSAT to choose the school, then my primary goal is to be practicing law that in some way helps and assists some undeserved class of people. I will do the best on my end studying to make that come true so that you don’t have to look back and think, “if only.” I don’t mean social justice law or anything like that, at least not exclusively, but some sort that you think betters the lives of everyday people instead of furthering the interests of those with the most power and influence. They have enough lawyers anyway, they will be fine without me. You should probably consider something that at least makes enough money to pay for all this school…. sorry about that.
If law doesn’t work out, or even if it does, teaching of some sort has always had an appeal to me, so I hope that by the time you read this, we have had the opportunity to explore that more. I hope that additionally, you are excited and passionate about learning as I am currently. I will work on keeping that alive for you.
You are blessed enough to already have a large and happy family, so I hope you keep and cherish them as much as I do now. I will keep pushing our children to help them pursue their own goals and have the direction that we did not, but I commit to you that I shall make sure those pushes are as gentle as possible.
If you fail to do all that… then you better at least have a funny comedy routine about it… biggest smiles mask the saddest faces or something to that effect.

May this letter find you in good health, until then,
Present Me

Plot twist.. or flip.

For the assignments, I like to just click the random button and see what comes up until something sticks out. For this one, monologue of a household tool, I read the normal assignment, had a thought that relates to my life, and decided to use the assignment to reflect that thought, however mundane it may be. I was writing about an everyday object, after all. The interesting part of the story, to me, is that is gives me a new way to look at and outwardly express that simple idea. What might be a complaint or gripe because an opportunity for unique story telling.  So, without further ado..

Lost in Space: A Cramped Unfamiliar One

This is not my home. I don’t even know how I ended up here. All the other contraptions here are keeping to themselves, but I am sure they are giving my dirty looks. It doesn’t matter anyway, not one cares what they think. They could never do what I do, rescuing objects from the fire and such. That one is pointy and small, I don’t know what anyone would want with that… and that one looks the same but much larger; I think it might be dangerous. I smell something going on out there, I suspect they will come after me very shortly… but how will they ever know where to look? Last time I took a shower, those small creatures brought me here; that seems like days ago now.
I really just want to be home, and to be quite honest about it, I am scared. I think I smelled the burning smell yesterday, but no one came. What if they found someone else to do my job? It isn’t like there is unemployment for things like me…. I will just end up stuck here forever… or worse. If they really did meet someone else, I might end up going with all those boxes, and paper, and old food, to whatever hell it is they run off to on Tuesdays and Fridays.
And now I smell the smell again… What is that sound, though. I don’t want anyone reading this to get too excited, but it sounds frantic. I hear banging, shuffling, movement, and that burning smell is intensifying. It smells like buttermilk and flour, with a hint of maple off somewhere in the distance; no way they can solve this one without me. I know they are coming, I just hope they make it in time. Being lost in the darkness most of your life is bad enough, but being lost in this foreign darkness is so much worse.
It is all happening so fast now, the noise got so much closer. There was some discussion between the big one and the little ones, it sounded frustrated. Now I smell a new smell, like a fruity sort of lotion one might use on their hands… Finally! I know it is ok now, I can feel the sliding and rolling underneath me, and the space is illuminated. I just need all these other guys to move so that she will see me. It is times like this when I despise being so flat, but how could I do my job if I wasn’t? Time to wrap this up for now though, it is only a matter of time before I am removed from here, off to work. I will need a shower when I am done again, but hopefully I find my way back home after the shower this time.